Assalamualaikum w.t.b salam hari Selasa... well here i'm again, sitting on my favorite sofa thinking of what i want to share with you bloggers on my second day off. I was given two days to rest... due to my "bisul". Knowing not to know what i'm suppose to write... i left my mind empty.. currently my heart and my brain doesn't work as a good teammate (sounds weird). I guess that's the reason why i couldn't think properly as i usually do... hurm.. a bit sad.. but i could not change nature force... sometimes you just need to let it pass thru your day...
Emptiness makes me sad, felt unwanted, left alone, depression... How i wish, i will never face this thing again?? How i wish, i will never be left alone? How i wish, i will never felt abandon? How i wish i, will not have this bad feelings?? There are thousands of HOW I WISH in my mind right now. How can i get rid of this feelings away??? I guess this is what so called "Bila Akal Dan Hati Tidak Selari"... walau aku berada di tengah-tengah kesibukkan dan dikelilingi dengan susana riuh rendah manusia... tapi aku masih rasa kekosongan...
Aku mahu rasa ini segera menganjak agar, aku akan kembali tersenyum... seperti hari-hari yang sering aku lalui... sesungguhnya 'kekosongan itu" merosakkan akal dan hati bila ada orang ke 3 membisikan perasangka-perasangka (you know who?? Encik "S") ... yang hanya akan membutakan mata dan menulikan telinga... It will never happen, and i won't let it happen to me.. As i'm stronger that He think he is... as Allah is always be by my side...
May Allah Almighty protects me always ... Jauh dari prasangak buruk, jauh dari hitamnya hati dan fikiran, jauhkan aku dari segala kekalutan yang cuma mainan duniawi ini... dan biarlah akal dan hati ku kembali bersatu... atau mungkin juga ada kekesalan di hati yang masih belum terungkai?? Dek rasa amarah dan benci?? Dan aku tahu... sesungguhnya "kemaafan" adalah perkara 'termanis' untuk aku menyatukan akal dan hati ku semula... perhaps I should forgive and forget?? Will i be happy again?? Semoga peraasan ini tak akan berulang lagi... dan lagi...
"Jiwa Kacau" please.... leave me ALONE... :(
kakk, sabarrr
ReplyDeleteCamy Alya: Ya itulah yang tengah akak buat.. thanks Camy :)
ReplyDeleteer.. sepeking pula PPP heeee..
ReplyDeletejiwa kacau tu memang lumrah insan bernama manusia.. lagi-lagi bergelar perempuan :)
Nong Andy: ha aaa ter"sekeping inggris" pulak.. ya la betul bah aku setuju ama ko... pompan ni hati nya selalu tak tentu arah kaa???
ReplyDeletehi dear..singgah kembali sini
ReplyDeletemmg dah nama manusia, jiwa nie sentiasa kacau & bergelora tapi ape² pun, selagi kite tak forgive and forget, benda itu akan sentiasa hantui kita...jope you can make the best decision :-)
m'maafkan mmg sukar tp m'maafkan adalh pkra y pling tbaik..skrangnya kita x di bebani ngn prsaan bnci N mrah lg...bila lam hati xda rasa 2 ngn sndri kita akn rsa bhgia wlupn beribu mslah y ada..snyum yer sis =) N byak2 sbar...
ReplyDeleteYou urself the only one person that who let that feeling linger.... U can make takt feeling go....
ReplyDelete♥ Wina ♥ : yup let's hope i didn't make wrong decision :) thanks..
ReplyDeleteIra Nira: Indeed... tapi melaksanankannya ibarat "batu caves" jatuh atas kepala :P anyway... really need your support, thanks, i knew i'd still have those who never let me down... :)
ReplyDeletemsredcheesecake: never stop givin up.. never stop not to let my feeling linger.. but it keeps on coming... :P and ya.. i agree with you.. it's me myself... dang me.. ha ha ha thanks for your advise... appreciate it...
ReplyDeleteusually if we do somethings wrong,must be ended by regret....sometime regret goods for your mind....kite akan sedar dimana silapnya....berulang sekali lagik??pasti ade care supaya x berulang...pisang x berbuah 2 kali kan?kan?n'way just bleh cakap dun't worry...u never be alone...with your attitude i know u can have many friends that u never imagine.....
ReplyDeletethanx for your advice to me before this....i really apperciate that....
PheoniX: i'm touched ... sob sob.. pelik la kan bila aku jadik sensitip cenggini.. tak penah pun ada org cakap macam ko cakap tu.. aku tak pernah rasa "ada orang yg menghargai" aku :P boleh??? he he walaupun ropa mu brutal... tapi tidak hati mu... thanks Pheonix for being there when i need a shoulder to cry on... waaaa lagi kuat aku nak nagessss....
ReplyDeleteOh my lovely sis.. moga tenang setelah berehat nie.. rindu sis <3 rindu entry yang mengundang ketawa tu.. :)
ReplyDeletehehehe...nak ameklah...bahu je tau....hakhakhak....
ReplyDeleteAida Omar: Thanks Aida... ya berdoa la semoga akak ni akan kembali seperti dolu-dolu... supaya aku dapat kembalikan senyuman semua orang yg pernah aku kenal.. ahaks.. bersajak la pulak... thanks sis... i really need you guys to support me, to gain back my smile, jokes and my previous PPP ... :)
ReplyDeleteha ha ha pastikan bahu ko tu ada besen klw tak habis basah kena ingus aku he3
ReplyDeletesabar ye kak....
ReplyDeleteaReLaN: thanks insyallah... :)
ReplyDelete